*sighs*

Well I just heard the news today
It seems my life is going to change
I closed my eyes begin to pray
Then tears of joy stream down my face

♥

She seemed dressed in all of me
Stretched across my shame
All the torment and the pain
Leaped through and covered me
I'd do anything to have her to myself
Just to have her for myself
Now I don't know what to do
I don't know what to do
When she makes me sad

♥

Restless tonight
'cause I wasted the light
Between all these times
I drew a really thin line
It's nothing I've planned
And nothing I can
But you should be mine
Across that line
If I traded it all
If I gave it all away for one thing Just for one thing
If I sorted it out
If I knew all about this one thing Wouldn't that be something

♥

Where is your boy tonight? I hope he is a gentleman.
Maybe he won't find out what I know
You were the last good thing about this part of town.
When I wake up, I'm willing to take my chances on the hope
I forget that you hate him more than you notice
I wrote this for you

♥

Hey there Delilah
What's it like in New York City?
I'm a thousand miles away
But girl tonight you look so pretty
Yes you do
Times Square can't shine as bright as you
I swear it's true
Hey there Delilah
Don't you worry about the distance
I'm right there if you get lonely
Give this song another listen
Close your eyes
Listen to my voice it's my disguise
I'm by your side

♥

When I see your smile
Tears run down my face I can't replace
And now that I'm stronger I've figured out
How this world turns cold and breaks through my soul
And I know I'll find deep inside me I can be the one

I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

Seasons are changing
And waves are crashing
And stars are falling all for us
Days grow longer and nights grow shorter
I can show you I'll be the one
Seasons are changing
And waves are crashing
And stars are falling all for us
Days grow longer and nights grow shorter
I can show you I'll be the one
Cause you're my, you're my, my true love, my whole heart
Please don't throw that away
Cause I'm here for you
Please don't walk away,
Please tell me you'll stay, stay
Use me as you will
Pull my strings just for a thrill
And I know I'll be okay
Though my skies are turning gray

♥

The weather has been wonderful this past week.
The cold helps frisk me, which is much needed.
Things seem to be a lot better, but I still miss my buddy... I really do.
Nobody in school knows that I have been upset lately, which is kind of nice.

I really miss my big brother.

Halloween is coming up this Wednesday, and I am totally psyched.
Hopefully I get to spend some time with Megan... I really hope so.
I haven't seen or talked to her in a few weeks.
Even though she lives just down the street, I miss the crap out of her.

This weekend I am working again, but it should be pretty fun,
because we are going to have our own little Halloween.
And the kids that run around are going to be very adorable...
=]
Saturday is probably going to be a little busier than usual.
But I'm not holding my breathe for it.

♥

I pray that mom has a decent weekend selling our products, and that Vinnie is doing fine, o'er yonder.
I pray that my friend's [who remains anonymous] father
remains strong while fighting his prostate cancer....
I hope he is going to survive... after seven long years of living in pain.
I pray for myself, for the ability to lift my average in Mrs. Taylor's class, along with not losing it with two snobby boys.

Matthew Murphy, Where Are You?

It is truly amazing how something so special can just...

disappear within a blink of an eye.

Someone I held dear to me since the sixth grade has been gone for a week.

No, he is not dead, but it really feels like he is.

I probably will never get to see him again. He has been taken into CPS,

and I am afraid for him.

I hope he is somewhere safe now, and with someone who cares

about him. Because now, that is what he really needs.

It sucks because he looked me in the eyes and told me

everything was going to be okay.

But...

It's not, it really isn't okay. I haven't heard a word from him.
This is what happens when you care too much about people. It just tears me apart.

It really does....

What's left to do??

I guess I just have to find out the answer on my own.

Why am I left here to suffer?

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Ti Amo Vincenzo

I keep asking myself,

"Why did HE have to leave us?"
Without him so far, this house isn't home anymore. It really isn't. I miss my big brother. I really do.
He left a couple of hours ago... and I'm trying not to think about it.
It kills me to know that when I wake up in during the middle of the night to get some water, he won't be there...

typing away on his computer.
When I gave him a hug before he left,
I couldn't let go of him. I became greedy. I wanted him to stay.

I wanted him all to myself.
Yes, I know that I have to move on, and life WILL go on, but it feels
like something has been torn out of my soul. I'm completely...
EMPTY.

It's going to be hard for me, but I should be able to get over it. I know I can handle it.
I love my big bro, I really do.

And it is true...

You DON'T know what you've got 'til it's gone.
I miss him so much.

But I know that he has a great future to look forward to. He really does.
I love you Vinnie.

"So long, and goodnight"